What Colour Is Your Bedroom Carpet?
Oh come on, at least read the first sentence before you leave. Wait, wait – oh well, they’re all gone. So myself, how was your day? Well, I tried to answer a stupid question and everyone left the site instantly before allowing me to answer it, leaving me in a desperate need for a hug. Oh I, that’s awful – what was this terrible question? Oh me, thanks for asking. Well now, it was about the colour of my carpet – hey, where are you going? Hang on, I need me to write this. Jules! I need to go and find me. Answer this question for me.
Hello, your local hobo here. I can confirm the master’s carpet is a delightful shade of beige with just a hint of mustard, but that’s probably because it’s so old is has holes in it. But I’m not one to judge. If that’s how folk want to live their lives then by all means, live it as you will, my son. Apparently, as I recall master telling me one merry moon long ago, these carpets were the very carpets that were here when he arrived. They are the same carpets throughout the entire small dingy apartment that he resides in keeping me shackled in with no food – hey, Jules, what are you writing. Hey, give me the keyboard back. No, get off it. No, I want to be free. No, you had your chance and you blew it. You never gave me a chance. Jules, we’re not having this argument. Oh, let me guess, it’s not the right time. Exactly. Oh, it’s never the right time. Oh, we can’t keep fighting; I don’t think this is working anymore – where’s my gun? No master, please – I can change; trust me, I’m sure your readers liked the answer – I promise.