No. I don’t have a sister. Life would’ve been very different if I did. Preening, dying, colouring, dressing up, hair stuff, makeup, etcetera, etcetera, all things little girls seem to think are funny doing to their little brothers. It’s not funny though, is it? It’s just humiliating. So, so incredibly cruel. Thank God I didn’t have a sister and therefore I have retained my dignity. And primitive manliness.
The list of things I didn’t do as a boy or as an adult is incredibly long and unbelievable. But all the following statements are true. I’ve never worn makeup. Or that fingernail paint stuff. Or any gloss. Or glitter. I’ve never had my hair done. I’ve never had a massage or beauty treatment. Never waxed anything. Never followed trends or fashion. Never had a fake tan. Or a real one, come to think of it. Never read a woman’s magazine. I think man-bags are ridiculous. I don’t gossip. I don’t groom except shaving once in a while. I don’t cry at pointless things except when a favourite TV character of mine dies. Oh how I miss you Michael Keppler. I’ve never dyed anything. And the cherry atop the cake? I’ve never dressed up as a woman or worn any item of women’s clothing before. No shoes, dresses, hats, scarves. Anything. Ever. At all.
So no, I’ve never dressed up as the opposite sex. And, like everything else on that list above, I never will unless there is a logical reason to do so.
The Friday Bonus Question:
Plucked from the basement of the internet, a bewildering real question that defies logic and an answer, here for you to ponder:
When I wake up in the morning, I see people that are not there. Is there something wrong with me?
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