What Is Your Favourite Hat?

Post 303

Oh, this looks really good for me, doesn’t it? Post 300 – What Is Your Favourite Type Of Underwear? Post 303 – What Is Your Favourite Hat? The image that probably gives you is most unpleasant. Honestly, these questions are picked at random by a machine. Seriously. Blame the machine. It’s the pervert. It’s Windows 7, what else do you expect? Now we’re onto hats. This should be fun. Long pause. Good. You believed that. Onwards, then.

I presume we all know what a hat is. I mean, I’d believe it if a three year old was indifferent to them, but beyond that, you should really know what one is. It’s a covering for the head. Worn for protection, ceremonial reasons, religious reasons, safety, fashion, social status, and to denote nationality, branch of service, rank or regiment. There are thousands of hats, I needn’t tell you, none of which I wear. I have long hair and when I wear a hat, it looks like I’m wearing one of those comedy hats with hair stapled inside. It’s not a good look. To be honest, nothing I own is a good look. I’ve just given up trying.

I’ve never understood berets. Looks like a pancake landed on your head. Not a great look. Cloche hats look like you’re going for a swim. In the 1920s. Cowboy hats don’t suit the British. A fez is certainly interesting but for me, that hat belongs to Tommy Cooper. I wouldn’t feel right wearing it. Plus, I’d look a bit stupid. Sorry, stupider. Beanie. Worn primarily in the summer by teenagers. They do know it was invented as a winter warming piece? Really doesn’t seem like they do. Sure, fashionable winter wear in the winter is okay but fashionable winter wear in the summer is just plain ridiculous. A baseball cap offers the back of your neck no protection, but if you wear it backwards, you look like a bit of a git. A fruit hat would be handy if I got hungry. An aviator hat would be quite stupid because we don’t really have that type of aviator anymore so wearing one would be purely for fashionable reasons, and you would look a bit of a spanner doing that, especially if you also wore the goggles. A ratting hat looks like someone put a flowerpot on your noggin’, whilst a capuchon looks like somebody stuck a traffic cone on it. And yes, a beaver hat is quite noble, but the name reminds me of a regal beaver, possibly with a monocle. I couldn’t wear a beaver hat without laughing.

So I’ll choose a top hat as my favourite hat. I think I could pull it off. It’s proper, fitting, noble, exacting, classy, modern and sexy – literally, six words that sum me up. No, you’re right, that’s a stupid thing to say. It’s SEVEN words. Sorry, I’m tired. A top hat for me would be grand. Plus, wearing one would be great practice for when I become a crazy millionaire living in a solid gold house. What? Could happen, readers. One day, one day.

What is your favourite hat?

Ciao :)(:

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post. You can leave a comment and/or like this post below, or by clicking the little bubble on the top right if you are on the Archives Page. Likes and follows greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Please feel free check out the latest posts from my other two blogs:

The Indelible Life of Me
New Post Every Sunday
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Hark Around the Words
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