The Solar System. Officially called… The Solar System. Really? Doesn’t have a name? Oh. Hmm. They always call it The Sol System in Star Trek. Gotta stop believing that’s a documentary. The Solar System. What a stupid name. So pretentious, isn’t it? ‘The’ Solar System. Id est, the best, the one, the only, the greatest, blah, blah, blah. Oh. What’s the point? There’s another one coming straight for us that will wipe us out in a couple billion years. But don’t worry, you’ll be dead by then. I mean, your descendants won’t be, but look at it this way. You don’t know them. Yes, this is The Solar System. Where we live. 15 billion miles in diameter and around four billion years old. But there’s more than this to the place we call home. Much, much more…
Despite not being the closest planet to the Sun, Venus is the hottest at 800 degrees Fahrenheit. There’s no such thing as asteroid fields. There are Mars rocks on Earth, believed to have come here from asteroid impacts with the red planet. Although it could have been an ancient civilization with a giant slingshot. Jupiter has the largest and deepest ocean in the whole Solar System, at an incredible 25 thousand miles deep. We are all living inside the Sun. Its atmosphere stretches out to an incredible 10 billion miles, and the surface is only 93 million miles away from Earth. The edge is 1,000 times farther away than Pluto. I presume ‘the edge’ is the actual edge of The Solar System and not the musician. And speaking of it, joke dwarf planet Pluto is smaller than the USA. Making the useless, dull, grey lump of crap even more of a joke.
I’m immediately ruling out The Asteroid Belt. I’m not keen on things that are definitely going to wipe out the whole of humanity one day. You know, if we haven’t blown ourselves to kingdom come by that point. I could apply similar logic to The Surface of the Sun. Sure, it’s spectacular but it’s not a wonder you can really enjoy without burning your retinas off, not to mention the fact that it will also kill us one day, when it explodes. You know, if the asteroids or nuclear annihilation have not gotten us by that point. The Oceans of Earth. Well, yes, unlike many things on this list, I could enjoy it, but I have a fear of water, not to mention the fact that it makes me sick, or the fact that I can’t swim. Or float. Enceladus. Mmm. I love Enceladus, it’s fascinating, but I don’t care if this wonders question is outside of planet Earth, I’m still going to abide by the original rules of wonders. You can’t make a whole place a wonder. Simple, really. The Great Red Spot is little more than a huge vicious bastard. And Olympus Mons is nothing but a wart on the face of Mars. Actually looks like a nipple. It really does look like one. It’s quite disturbing. Hmm.
So what do I choose? Jupiter, Uranus and Neptune all have them. But there’s another planet that has them too. It may not be unique, but it’s certainly the best and the most spectacular. Yes, I’ll go for the simply stunning Rings of Saturn. They are incredibly beautiful and such a spectacular wonder. It is something that can and does take one’s breath away and I think that’s why it deserves to be labelled the best. Because it truly is.
The Rings of Saturn. My favourite wonder of The Solar System.
Photo: Saturn and his rings
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